Monday, July 23, 2012

Big Brother 14 Recap: Episode 5

Willie Meltdown in 3,2,1 and Boom

The fallout from the eviction was not even felt with Frank winning the HoH and Willie putting that giant bull’s eye on his back. What we do learn at the start of the episode is that Janelle told her team to vote out Kara in order to keep Frank in the house. Janelle wanted to keep Frank so she can keep the heat of her players by having that conflict between Willie and Frank in the house.

Frank and Boogie celebrate, Frank staying in the house and winning HoH, in the diary room by doing a very good imitation of the great chill town interviews of seasons passed. They even finish the interview with a patented Boogie/Will laugh attack.

Frank’s HoH room looks a lot like Willie’s HoH room except we actually get to see some pictures this time. Frank has a childhood picture of him with a mullet. I knew I liked this guy for a reason. Boogie also gets a picture in his HoH coach suite. Is it just me or do we never get to see the mother of this child? Did he adopt? Does she not want to be on TV?

Britney has a sit down with Willie, after Janelle tells her he has to go, and after chewing him out for a good 3 minutes she tells him that he really screwed it up for his team. Willie tells her that he came to the house playing for himself he never wanted a team, making sure his team doesn’t want to help him anymore. He even tells Britney “I’m a big boy; I can take care of myself.”

The other house guests seem to be going about their days, JoJo was telling Frank about their plans just so she could “stay loyal” (?) to her team. I don’t know if she knows what that means. Shane is flirting with Danielle with the old “do you know what a weenis is?” and the “does this hurt move?” I thought Shane was an adult, I bet he pushes her in the pool before the end of the season.

Boogie decides that, what better way to have another conversation with Britney than to threaten her again. This time he tells her that if she wins the Head of Household competition that it “might” be in her own interest to keep Willie instead of possibly trading him. His way of explaining this to Britney is by telling her that if she trades Willie, Shane will become the main target of the house. You can probably guess how Britney took getting threatened for a second time since they’ve been in the house.

Ian tells Boogie he has this idea of possibly taking Ashley on a “slop date” (a date where they both eat Big Brother slop). Boogie doesn’t think he has a shot with her but while discussing this plan with Dan, Dan takes it upon himself to act like a elementary student and run to Ashley and tell her “somebody might have something to ask you outside.” She goes outside to have Ian awkwardly (with boogie hiding behind a beach ball) ask her out on slop date. Ashley decides to give Ian a chance because she has “a soft spot for nerdy guys with glasses.”

This has to be the most awkward segment in Big Brother history. In his green dress shirt and polka dot bow tie Ian is told to go pick up his date in the bathroom. How nice. Then they go into the “arcade room” and relax while Britney plays waiter for the awkwardly good looking couple. They go on to talk about inorganic chemistry, and Ashley asks the difference between inorganic and organic chemistry only to be so confused by Ian’s answer that she asks him to repeat it. Ian says that he doesn’t get to go on very many dates because he’s “pretty busy in his regular life.” (Yeah, sure Ian)

Before the coaches competition JoJo and Shane try and convince Britney that losing Willie really would be better off for the team. Britney really doesn’t need much convincing telling her two players to keep their distance from Willie so they won’t be targeted like him.

Frank comes out to announce the coach’s competition looking like a white-hillbilly-MC-Hammer. The competition is that the coaches will have to carry stacks of “money from one side of a balancing beam to the other. When they get to the far side they have to stack their stacks like Jenga pieces until they don’t have any more stacks of “cash” left on the original side. They will be knocked out if the fall of the beam or if any one of their stacks of “cash” hit the ground.

Dan decides before the competition that in order to keep up his “weak persona” he is going to have to throw this competition. He either sees that as an advantage or is just covering his butt because he sucks at competitions.

Britney starts off the competition like a fire cracker, she takes an early lead. She starts off to such a good pace some of her houseguest compared her to some quick animals and objects. Dan says “it’s like an Arkansas hog running from the farmers.” Wil compares her to “a frickin’ flyin’ squirrel.” And Ian says “it’s like a Jack Rabbit is on that balance beam.”

No one is even close to Britney. Janelle and Boogie are pretty much tied in second and Dan is still pretending to lose. Britney was going so fast when she tried to grab another block of cash; she knocked over a couple of other ones and was eliminated from the competition. Janelle and Boogie are really close to finishing but Boogie has a slight lead. On his way to hit the buzzer and win the win the competition Boogie gets overconfident and steps off his beam eliminating himself from the contest. Janelle then easily beats Dan, who is still not half way to finishing.

Janelle decides to keep Ashley safe for the week, as opposed to making a trade saying that she loves her players to much. Janelle’s other task was to choose have not’s for the week. She chose Willie, JoJo, Shane and Ian. JoJo reacted poorly to Janelle’s decision in a diary room interview calling Janelle a “mean bitch” for making Shane a have not two weeks in a row.

When the house guest get back into the house after the competition, the have not’s find out that America has given them porc rinds and pudding as a treat on top of the slop they will have to eat all week. Ian is extra excited saying that he loves pudding and his “grandma eats pudding and my long lost cousins probably eat it.”

After everyone calms down from the excitement Willie tries to talk to JoJo in private which Britney quickly stops. She tells JoJo that it isn’t good for her to be seen all chummy with him. Willie tells JoJo that he plans on getting the heat off of her and Shane and get it put back on him. Britney keeps telling Willie to leave the other players alone because he is putting their game in jeopardy, she tells him to stop acting like that around her and her team and go act like an asshole around the other house guests. Willie replied to Britney’s challenge by screaming “You think I’m scared?” and running up to the HoH room to tell Frank that it is his fault everything happened and that JoJo and Shane had no part in it.

Everything that happened this episode, from his team and coach abandoning him and all the backstabbing, Willie is about ready to explode and I think he knows he’s leaving so he’s going to do it his own way. He sits in the kitchen, and decides to think out loud “I ain’t never seen a bigger group of p------ in my life.” He continues with “A bunch of p------ in this b----“ only to have Joe retort “You’re the only p---- I see, brah.” Then shit started to hit the fan. Willie lost it and charged Joe yelling “What you say?” Joe turned to him in a fighter's stance and Willie started telling Joe to hit him. They stood chest to chest, with Ian in a towel trying to break them up, ready to get into it. I guess Willie thought he wasn’t doing enough and decided to throw a kind of shove/head butt. As soon as he made contact a voice came over the loudspeaker telling Willie to go to the diary room. Once in the diary room Willie was escorted from the house and expelled from the game.

Everyone expressed their feelings about Willie leaving after producer, Allison Grodner, explained to the them that Willie had been kicked out. Most of cast were glad Willie was gone with Britney even saying she was relieved he was gone but also that she was scared about her disadvantage that Willie had left them with.

This season is heating up, with the most exciting character being expelled from the hous in the second week. Hopefully that means someone else will step into his role as the house villain and not that the house will become extremely boring (like last season).

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